Seize The Night's Star

What fucking time is it?!

2006-04-17T18:42:24Z

It's time for an update, of course.

Bill and I found a drummer!!! YAY!!! His name is Aaron. So, the punkabilly band is finally coming together. We've had a couple of practices and have one song basically written, along with a few cover songs that we used to just get used to playing with a new drummer.

Bill and I went down to State Street here in Madison and played instruments the other day for all the passer-bys. Bill played an accoustic guitar and I played my upright bass. That bass sure is an attention getter, and I don't mind the attention one bit! I can't wait to start playing shows with the new band!

The band needs a name. So far all we've come up with is The Moped Gang or The Remarkable Heros. Hmmm...maybe The Moped Heros? or The Remarkable Gang?

Soo, these days I have no money. Sucks. Things should start getting a little better money wise at the end of this week, though it will still be really tight basically until I start working full-time.

Speaking of work, I got a job at CapTel translating for deaf people. w00t. I've been in training for the last two weeks and again all this week. Then next week I start working my normal schedule, which will be 28 hours a week until summer comes, and then it will be full-time.

I'm thinking I may try to get a second part-time job to work over the summer. Perhaps I'll save the money for school or maybe finish my AMX. Bill offered to possibly let me use the engine out of his Javelin until I finish building my engine. He's probably gettting a different engine for the Jav. If I do get a 2nd job and use his engine for the time being, I could possibly have my car done by the end of summer. We'll see. I don't want to half-ass it.

School is going great...I've got straight A's going for the first time in my life. Hopefully that will stay that way through the end of the sememster. This whole money thing is adding a lot of stress to the situation which is causing me to lose my focus on a school a bit, but I recognize that this is happening and I'm determined to keep my A's.

Some drywallers are here right now. Long story short, they are fixing all the holes in the walls that were left from the electical inspection. It's about fucking time. The landlords said it would take 2 weeks from start to finish. It's been 2 and a half months. In the meantime, we've been living in dust covered rooms because the landlods are fucking arrogant asshole peices of shit. *rant*

Well, that's it.

* Monday, a day like no other *

Fucking bigots

2006-03-30T21:08:34Z

Sooo...here's the first update in a long-ass time...

I hate intolerance. I refuse to tolerate the intolerant.

I just got out of my State and Local Government class. We were talking a lot about political participation. We got on the topic of this new law that has been propsed that would make illegal immigrants felons. Not only that, but the law states that we would then deport any and all illegal immigrants.

All 11 million of them.

Fucking bigots that run our government. I hate 'em.

There was a protest last week about this law...over 500,000 people in Los Angeles and over 1,000,000 people nation wide participated. After class I got into a bit of an argument with a very outspoken republican student that is also in the class. He was saying that the vast majority of those people protesting were illegal immigrants. He may be right.

But the part that pissed me off was when he said that because they are illegal immigrants and, thus, not citizens, they don't have the right to protest. They don't have the right to walk in the street and protest legislation that would prevent them from pursuing the American Dream.

Fucking bigot. I hate bigots.

Strange that this WHITE MALE asshole could have such a point of view. After all, his ancestors that protested against the English were not citizens of this country. Hell, the only people that were citizens were the Native Americans. And we all know how well we treated them after the "revlution."

On the statue of liberty there is a line from the poem "The New Colossus" that reads "Give me your tired, your poor." The last lines of the poem read:

Give me your tired, your poor,
Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free,
The wretched refuse of your teeming shore.
Send these, the homeless, the tempest-tost to me,
I lift my lamp beside the golden door!

I guess these bigots should probably change there fucking statue so that she's giving everyone else the middle fucking finger.

* Last night I saved an Angel *

A true, but funny story.

2005-12-15T11:30:40Z

So, I was sitting in my room the other day when I realized that my socks that I was wearing didn’t match. Clearly I needed to do something about this. Now, most people would have just changed socks, or found matching socks. Not me. Nope. I decided that what I actually needed to do was buy new socks.

So I went to bed.

The next day when I awoke I realized that I’d never actually taken my socks off. I was still wearing my mix-matched socks. "Damn," I thought. "I never did anything about my socks. I should go buy some socks."

So I took a shower.

And ate breakfast while reading a newspaper story.

After filling my head with knowledge and my stomach with Cheerios and milk, I went outside and found it had snowed several inches. "Well, this sucks," I thought as I stood in the snow with my mix-matched socks on. "Now my feet are cold and wet. I probably should have put some boots on. Or at least some shoes."

So I went back inside and cried.

And I didn’t get frost-bite on my cheeks because I wasn’t still outside.

And my nose got sniffly because that’s what happens when you cry a lot about your feet being cold and wet.

After short but epic battle with my temporary moodiness, I found my boots. My socks were soaked, though, so I decided to put them in the washer with some other clothes. "No problem," I thought. "I’ll just wash and dry them and some other clothes and then go to the store."

So I washed and dried my socks.

And some other clothes.

And everything came out of the dryer all hot and smelling fresh.

And then my socks weren’t soaked anymore.

Next I realized I needed to put my clean clothes away, so I headed up to my bedroom to put the clothes in my dresser. All told, I had cleaned my mix-matched socks, a pair of jeans, two T-shirts, a pair of boxers, my Star Wars sheets, and about four other pairs of socks, some of which looked strikingly similar to my mix-matched socks.

So I made my bed with my freshly cleaned Star Wars sheets.

And I put my T-shirts in the second drawer of my dresser.

And I put the socks and boxers in the first drawer.

And I hung my jeans on a hanger in the closet.

And I laid down on my bed feeling giddy about having Star Wars sheets.

For the next hour, I day-dreamed of what it would be like to be Luke Skywalker. "Man," I thought, "that would be awesome!" At one point during my dreamy adventures, my cats came and ate some food out of their food bowl, which is next to my bed. They are adorable.

So I watched them eat their food.

And I pet them when they were done.

And I realized one of them has dandruff.

And I watched the other one clean herself.

And I day-dreamed she was Darth Vader.

And I imagined using the force on her.

Now it was the middle of the afternoon and time to do something about the socks. I put my boots on and went outside again. After shoveling my car out of the snow, I went to the store and bought some ham. I like ham. Then I went to the socks area and found both of the types of socks I was wearing. I couldn’t decide which kind I wanted though.

So I tore open the packages of both.

And I took half of each package out and put them all in one package.

And I took the other half and threw them in the trash.

And I walked up to the cashier.

And the cashier was a homosexual.

And I paid for my new mix-matched socks that would solve my mix-matched sock problem.

And then I went home.

THE END!!!

The moral of this story is that my stories don’t make any sense.

This call for revolution.

2005-11-29T15:17:21Z

For all of my people I dedicate this call, my call. For all of our future I dedicate this call, my call. For my elders, my siblings, my peers, and my young I dedicate this call, my call...

"Let them call me rebel and welcome, I feel no concern from it; but I shall suffer the misery of devils were I to make a whore of my soul..." - Thomas Paine

"Lest we forget at least an over-the-shoulder acknowledgment to the very first radical: from all our legends, mythology, and history (and who is to know where mythology leaves off and history begins--or which is which), the first radical known to man who rebelled against the establishment and did it so effectively that he at least won his own kingdom--Lucifer." - Saul Alinsky

"But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such Government, and to provide new Guards for their future security." - The unanimous Declaration of the thirteen united States of America

"This country, with its institutions, belongs to the people who inhabit it. Whenever they shall grow weary of the existing government, they can exercise their constitutional right of amending it, or their revolutionary right to dismember or overthrow it." - Abraham Lincoln

"Shall my life become that of a slave? Shall I become a man of no more importance to Ye than that of a simple servant? Nay, for the wealth of the earth belongs not thee but to all. Fair warning, Master...thy time is short." - Daniel Kane

I dedicate this call, my call, for revolution.

My cat is adorable.

2005-10-22T05:57:20Z

Murdoc takes comfort in knowing there are no dogs allowed.

On a side note...I need some new icons for this thing. I should make some, eh?

* What is going on in there? It sure doesn't smell like pork or beef to me *

My new bass!

2005-10-18T01:34:43Z

WOOHOO!!

And yes, I realize I look like a complete dork in this picture.

for Nicole! (or anyone else who wants to see these videos)

2005-10-18T01:03:49Z

Nekromantix - Gargoyles Over Copenhagen

Tiger Army - Incorporeal

Tiger Army - Cupid's Victim

Tiger Army - Rose Of The Devil's Garden

If you have a 3rd party download program (like Download Accelerator) you should use that to download them. Internet Explorer will only download them to a temporary folder.

* My love, it is a black rose *

UPRIGHT BASS!!!

2005-10-14T14:55:05Z

I got my bass yesterday!! :-D It's AWESOME!!! I also got to hang out with Keirsten and Claire and a bunch of their friends in Chicago. We all went to see the HorrorPops play and, much to my satisfaction, they are much better live than their recordings lead you to believe. They played a LOOONG set, though, which got to be a bit much. Nevertheless, it was great!!

What a great day yesterday was, despite having to drive for ten hours to get to Indianapolis and then back to Chicago. I'll put some pics up of the new bass when I'm back in Madison.

PSYCHOBILLY ME!!!

2005-10-09T12:29:59Z

Woot! I am going to Chicago to see the HorrorPops play on Thursday. I GET TO SEE KEIRSTEN AND CLAIRE, TOO!!! =D

But before that, I'm driving to Indianapolis to pick up me owns Upright Bass! WOOHOO! Now I, too, will be albe to be a psychobilly rock star like Kim Nekroman and Lee Rocker!!

*sigh* Life is good...for once.

CELEBRATES

2005-09-25T13:31:47Z

So, it's been a while since I've said anything useful or up to date. I think I'm about due. But first let me point out my new journal look...no longer all blue and black. GRAY and black now! AAAAWWWW YEEEEEAAA!!

I applied a few weeks ago to MATCs Liberal Arts Transfer program. Basically with this program you can get either an Associate's Degree in Liberal Arts or an Associate's Degree in Liberal Sciences. Then at the end of the program you are able to transfer to a four-year college. Basically, this is used as a sort of stepping stone for people who want to go to a four-year school and major in whatever field they feel like. The point is, you get a proper four-year degree from an accredited college. Since most people going to MATC in this program are aiming at UW-Madison, the program is geared towards transferring there.

I basically set myself a lifetime goal to someday return to college and work my way into a four-year school and get a proper major in something...I didn't care what. I just decided that this is something I still want to do sometime in my life. After I saw this program at MATC in their course offerings catalog I became very excited about it, particularly when I noticed that I VERY MUCH meet their minimum qualifications for the program. (Basically, if you have a high school degree, GED, or HSED you can get into this program.) Suddenly I thuoght that I might be seeking this goal sooner in my life than I had originally planned.

Because the program is basically a lot of college level general courses, they have openings for it every spring and fall semesters. So, I figured I'd apply for the spring semester and see if I could get in.

So with that, I've been axiously awaiting a reply. Friday afternoon I called the admissions office to find out how long it usually takes to hear back from them. The lady I talked to said it usually takes eight to ten weeks. It had been two since I applied. However, I must have given her my name at some point in our brief conversation because yesterday I got a letter dated from Friday saying that I GOT ACCEPTED!! WOOHOO!!! *dances around the room* I think they must have just decided to quick look through my application and my transcript since I had called about it.

So come January, I'm going back to school full-time. I'm SOO friggin' pumped about it. Granted I'll have to do really well in order to be able to go to UW Madison, that is definately what I'm aiming for. I never thought I'd ever be this excited about school...particularly knowing that it means going back to studying subjects I didn't like in high school. SO BE IT!

Other than that there isn't a whole lot interesting that has happened lately. Oh, I got my cats fixed the other day (or broken, however you look at it). There officially will be no kitten having for my girls. Hopefully Ultimate Warrior will stop peeing on things now. And it'll be nice to not have to deal with them being in heat every few weeks. They've been kind of anti-social since Thursday when they had the operation, but they are starting to come around. Both of them were feeling frisky enough when I got home from work this morning to want to play with my boot laces with me while I was taking my boots off.

Hmmm...what else. OOOhh! I went to Fighting Bob Fest a couple weeks ago. That was a blast. My dad showed up there, too. It was in Baraboo, about 45 minutes from here. It was cool to be amungst 5000 other people that all, basically, think the same way I do on politics. You should check out fightingbob.com Ed Garvey has done a wonderful job of creating a festival for the progressive voice in Wisconsin.

I got some super awesome shirts at Bob Fest. One is black with a big red star in the middle of it (WOOHOO!! GO COMMUNISM!). Another is white with an amirican flag, the white stripes are a pattern of bombs and the stars are militarial headstones. And the last one is gray with a really funny looking characture of George W. Bush with the caption "Best Evidence Against Inteligent Design." It's great!

Hmm...so I guess more has gone on than I thought.

I should be getting a raise at work in the next week or two. That'll put me at $12.32 an hour.

Hmm...well, I'm hungry and tired from work. Off to eat and sleep.

* I can feel you dreaming of me *

very quick update

2005-09-10T02:23:27Z

I applied to MATC for their Liberal Arts Transfer program. Basically it means that, if I get accepted, I'll go to MATC for two and a half years and then transfer to one of the UW Campuses (likely UW Madison). WOOT! I'm excited....I hope I get accepted! It would mean I could pursue a major in Political Science or Linguistics, which for some odd reason I really want to do.

That's all for now.

* LIVE TO FIGHT!! FIGHT TO LIVE!!! *

My new apartment...

2005-08-20T00:12:53Z

We got the last of the stuff from my sister's today, which means I'm officially moved in to the new apartment.

So,

Mudoc likes the top of my new desk. Alyson gave me this desk for FREE since she's going to be living in Argentina for the next year. She also gave me a nice office chair.

So, starting at the door and working your way around the room, it looks like this...

I like how the flash on the camera brings out even the slightest bit of dirt on the walls or the lightest of imperfections in the paint.

Time for a nap.

W00t! The internet works at my new house!

2005-08-17T20:20:44Z

So, I got the internet running and now you can read what I wanted to post the other night before I had the internet running at this new house.

Nobody can read this message because I don't have the internet yet.

2005-08-17T20:19:46Z

So, I am writing this message on August 15th at about 9:00 p.m. Nobody will be able to read it until I get the internet going again.

I'VE MOVED!

Ugh...what a nightmare of a move. It's bad enough when you have to move your own stuff. But when you add to that having to move three other people and all of their stuff the process becomes even worse.

And we were on a timeline. We weren't able to start moving until Saturday night at 8:30, but we had to have all of our stuff out of the old house by 10:45 a.m. on Sunday. So Justin, Bill, and I pulled an all-night shift of moving. Danika basically did, as well, though she got about a five hour nap from four to nine. We just barely got all of our stuff out in time.

Actually, the process isn't over. We're, obviously, still setting up the new house, but a lot of our stuff is still at my sister's house. We took some stuff there last week to assure that we'd get everything out in time. All of that still needs to be picked back up...three van loads worth.

Well, anyways...the worst of it is over...my room is absolutely gigantic...pictures when I can actually post this.

* I'm a hopeless romantic. You're just hopeless. *

noctem_aster @ 2005-08-10T08:40:00

2005-08-10T13:40:46Z

When I got home from work today I got thinking about Bernard Ebbers, the former CEO of WorldCom. I got looking up some of the stories printed about his case after he was sentenced and found one from the Milwaukee Journal Sentinal that had a picture of him, his wife, and his lawyer leaving the courthouse after the sentencing. In the picture his lawyer is trying to push away cameras and it's clear that Ebbers is crying.

Everyone I know that owns a computer seems to put some kind of picture on their background of something that triggers a happy emotional response. For me, for some reason, I felt like this picture I'd found of Ebbers' despair was the right picture for my background.

Is that wrong of me? Is it immoral for me to get joy out of other peoples' pain? Perhaps in most situations it is, but for some reason I feel I should take a great deal of pride in this sight. Considering the pain this man and his own version of the "Bush Crime Family" that he had working under him at WorldCom brought upon the regular folks that worked for and invested their future in this company, I feel no guilt whatsoever in laughing at what I consider to be sweet vengence.

I feel this way, and yet I am NOT one of his victims. Is that wrong of me? I should think not, because if and when the Wal-Mart coporate powers that be decide to try the same trick, I very well may be one of the victims. And when they go down, I will be laughing again. But, as I'm sure is the case with the so many victims of WorldCom, my joy will be met only with my own despair.

* You and me will all go down in history with a sad Statue Of Liberty and a generation that didn't agree *

NEW (old) COMPUTER!!!!

2005-07-30T02:38:23Z

I GOT A NEW COMPY TODAY!!!

I bought myself an old PowerMac G4. :-D It's actually older than my PC, but I'm just psyched to finally have broken into the Mac world.

*sigh* YAY!

Oh, and I bought myself a mini-refrigerator.

stuff

2005-07-08T14:28:39Z

It's my birthday in two days...you know what I'm doing to celebrate?

NOTHING!!!

...at least, not until Wednesday, which is when I'm going on vacation for a week and a half....W00T!

I finally finished fixing my van the other day. It runs great now. That was Tuesday, and then Wednesday afternoon I spent a few hours taking all the inside stuff apart and thoroughly cleaning it all and then putting it all back together. The inside is about the cleanest it's been since I bought it. Then yesterday I washed the outside of it. I also re-wired my subwoofer in it so that the wires aren't laying out across the floor. So now the wires are all hidden inside the trim along the ceiling, except one spot where you can see about two inches of it above the driver's door. This way nobody (including me) will trip on it.

My roomate was pointing out that if you sit in the middle or back seat of my van while I have the sub going all you hear is the bass. But then when he switched to the front seat he didn't think it sounded very bad. So, clever me, I decided while I was rewiring it yesterday to add a power switch so that if I'm carrying people with me I can just turn the sub off and everybody can enjoy the music without hearing loads of bass. Then when I'm by myself I can just flip the switch to turn it back on. It's cool...the switch is all subtle-like and hidden by my feet. I'm so awesome!

I had my job interview yesterday at Trek. I think I got the job. *crosses fingers* We'll see I guess. If I do get the job I'll be working Monday through Friday from 1 p.m. until 9 or 10. Actually, for the first month or so I'll be working 5 a.m. until 1 or 2 p.m. until I get trained, and then I'll be working 2nd shift. I'm very much liking the idea of having a non-third shift job AND not having to work Saturdays and Sundays.

Well, that's all for now. My hair is falling out cuz I bleached it again for my interview.

* HATE, FUCK this revolting world!! *

YAY!!!

2005-06-30T19:36:50Z

I HAVE A JOB INTERVIEW NEXT WEEK!!! *thoroughly excited* I might finally be able to leave Wal-Mart!!!!!

WOOT!!!

I have no passion for or in life.

2005-06-25T22:43:16Z

So, here's a long overdue update...

The last time I wrote a real update I was elated about how well life was going for me. EVERYTHING has been downhill since then...

My van stopped working about two months ago and I haven't been able to get it fixed.

Alyson and I broke up about a month and half ago and the last few days I've been missing her a lot. Actually, I think I've just been plain lonely a bunch. I can never seem to shake this feeling of loneliness. I feel so, so alone in this world.

I had to spend my money that I WAS going to use to get my van fixed on getting two of my teeth pulled. Terrific for me, eh?

I changed my hair color again the other day...my mohawk is now orange and I've grown out the hair on the sides for once, and it is green. yay

I've not gone to a single show since I moved to Madison...that's fucking pathetic. I need to change that.

I have the horrible, horrible feeling of discontent. A few weeks, when asked how I've been, I told Andrea's mother that I am "happy, but not without a sense of discontent." What bullshit...I'm not happy. I'm completely full of discontent.

I don't know why I've lied to everyone so much lately...people seem to like your attention more if you pretend to be all happy and joyous. "Oh, things are going well for me" makes people be happy and want to have fun with you. But none of them ever see through the lies. Why should they? Who cares if I'm broken inside and falling apart? This world has not dealt me a bad card...I've dealt it to myself. I just can't seem to change my hand.

I'm really tired of feeling like I'm going nowhere with my life...but as much as I say that, I can't seem to bring myself to find a sense of direction...I can't seem to set any goals for myself. I can't seem to decide what it is I want out of life.

I know I don't want to work at Wal-Mart anymore.

What's funny about all of this is that I'm confessing to people that I'm miserable, and I know that that's going to put people off. I know because I've had friends that are constantly depressed and I don't want to deal with them, either. But, I can't hold this inside anymore. I'm sick of crying myself to sleep and then putting on a smile for the world. The world's given me nothing to smile about, so why should I give others a reason to smile?

I should make it clear...I don't feel hopeless. In fact, in MOST cases, I feel I'm just not seizing my life. I just need to find something to give me strength again.

Most of time when I've written some message like this I put some message of hope at the end of it....but this time....

* And as the winter comes, and as the seasons change
Closer to death I come, we face this curse of days *

HAHAHAH!!!!!

2005-06-24T22:17:41Z

http://www.esquilax.com/baywatch/index.shtml

Some random nonsense

2005-06-24T12:33:31Z

Well, I haven't updated with a real update in a long-ass time. I haven't got much to update on, though. My life is rather dull.

But, I've been thinking about stuff.

Are we real? What's up with this stupid fucking human race that we've managed to create so much technological knowledge despite being so primitive in nature. Perhaps I'm just being pessimistic, but I really think that this idea that we need more toys is not smart. I think that we could do better for ourselves to be working on the human race rather than the technological race.

I'm guilty of it...I like my toys. =( Does that make me wrong?

Why does frozen pizza taste great after it's cooked, and still taste pretty decent when it's just reached room temperature, but yet pizza from a delivery joint only tastes good if it's still hot? It's like they purposely try to trick you into getting sick from eating the pizza too fast so it still tastes good. And forget about reheating it...that just doesn't seem to work with delivery pizza.

Where is my life heading? Where is my drive in life? Why am I floating through things?

Do you think if God were to take acid he'd see people?

There's a real cynic in me. For some reason I'm rooting for the destruction of the human race. Maybe I'm just a disappointed idealist, but I just can't forsee us having a real future.

Every once in a while, as I'm chewing food or something, I'll get this really annoying clicking sound in my left ear that won't go away. But then just as I'm getting used to it, it goes away, most of the time without me even noticing. What the fuck is that noise?

The beauty of the human race is it's ability to create logical thought and emotion. Someday I'll be in love, but until then I'll have to think of ways to find it. I wonder how Adam felt about this before he met Eve.

What's up with gun nuts? I think they really are nuts.

Yes, there is definately a bit of idealist in me. Perhaps someday we'll learn to erase our borders of land and borders of language and borders of prejudice and the human race will be truly intelligent. I don't think it'll come, though...not without a certain bit of terral destruction.

I wonder how the guitarists from Death By Stereo played that cool little solo bit in their new song "Forget Regret."

Hidden beneath all the mess of the world is a real beauty. Beneath all the mess of this message is a real message. I wonder, will you find it?

* well if sweet-talkin you would make it come true
I'd give you the world right now on a silver platter
But what would it matter? *

noctem_aster @ 2005-06-14T17:09:00

2005-06-14T22:09:53Z

Did you ever wonder "Will I make it through this night?"
Did you ever wonder "Will I live for sacrifice?"
Have you ever wondered "Will I ever see the light?"
Have you ever wondered "Can I live another life?"

I can't take away this fever, I can't take away the pain
But I will fight with you forever, forever and a day
I can't face this world on my own, I keep on searching for your face
I promise that we'll live forever, forever and a day

And in your darkest hour you bleed without a knife
Your searching, losing power. Your whole life has been a fight
You keep on giving selflessly, the world keeps on taking selfishly
You keep it bottled up inside...feel the sting. Let's take another ride...

I can't take away this fever, I can't take away the pain
But I will fight with you forever, forever and a day
I can't face this world on my own, I keep on searching for your face
I promise that we'll live forever, forever and a day

Am I alone in this glass box I can't shatter from inside?
Can you tell me, will we make it out alive?
Come on...let's take another ride
Forever and a day

:(

2005-06-12T01:49:18Z

One of my wisdom teeth is swollen and sore and needs to be pulled, but I have to wait until at least Monday. I don't know if I can live through this pain that long :(

A short story I wrote (and some other stuff)

2005-06-06T13:29:27Z

Twas many moons past that it happened. Twas agony to make things right again. All the while hoping for the impossible, hoping for a miracle. All the while knowing it wouldn't be.

Twas many moons past that she split her soul in two. Though her love was deep, she knew it couldn't be. As he left her side and ventured out of her life, twas the pain of death to see him go. The tears ran long and hard, undried by his touch. She lay lost in her own world, confused by her sights and tormented by her thoughts. Unforgiving were the Gods as they punished her for her insolence.

Twas many moons past that he left her there alone. Long were the nights, longer still were the days. A dark shadow had replaced the brilliant, shinging light that was her heart.

Twas many moons that past before she made things right again. Of love she knew nothing, of life she cared not. The fire in her soul burnt all but out.

Twas many moons passing to fill the hole he'd left her. The miracles and impossibilities never came to be, but miraculously she did. Impossible now would it be to bring her down again.

Twas many moons passing she spent on mending her wounds. Indeed she had recovered, but the scars of love could be seen from miles away. Never would she let go of what love she still had for him.

Twas just three moons ago that she lay herself down. With the love for him still strong, she gave in to her pain. Joyous was the night as she let go of restraint and brought happiness to her soul.

Twas just two moons ago that the confusion began again. Had her soul somehow survived? Was she not free from her pain?

Twas only a moon ago that the torment began again. Painful are her thoughts. Unrelenting is the agony she now endures. Even now, she still hopes for the impossible, hopes for a miracle. But, surely cursed, her soul now lay useless.

Twas many moons past that she split her heart in two. Yet the scars will always be seen, no matter how dead her soul shall be.

----

So, I haven't updated in a long fucking time. Perhaps I should do that.

But, not right now. Bill and I spent three days straight, including one eight-teen hour day, working on his car. We also played a show on Friday night at the warehouse, which was a lot of fun. All the same, I'm exhausted now and I'm going to bed. GOODNIGHT!!!

blah blah blah

2005-05-28T12:14:51Z

This is an update since I haven't updated in a while.

Yep. Bye.